Intense experience

I'm home from Grenada, noticing this morning how surreal the whole experience seems. I recall when reading here about Sandy Bechtold, Lynn Montgomerry and Paul Osimo's deaths, feeling sad for the loss of a friend, and for the loss their mates were experiencing. I realize now I really had no idea what it was like for the mates and the families.of those past friends. The difference in intensity is dramatic.

It struck me this morning, almost like a revelation, when I saw the "clean" sticky my Anne posts on the dishwasher to tell me it's time to empty it (that's one of the jobs, I've been assigned), "Oh. Yes. Life goes on, doesn't it?"

Seeing the news, hearing about the primary elections in Iowa when I got to the Grenada airport yesterday, talking with some folks from NC at the airport about our shared hopes for the Panthers in the Super Bowl, and walking in a kind of daze from gate 19 to gate 41 at the Miami airport between flights (my 3/4 miles of exercise for the day), all confronted me with, Life goes on, doesn't it?"

Being my real, as opposed to imaginary age, has never been so obvious or confronting. I don't have the physical or emotional stamina I expected to have through this and the reality of that really came home to roost, toward the end of my time with Brian M.

Brian has climbed up out of the deep dark hole of racking pain so he's able to grieve without being overwhelmed by it. He's still in Grenada, expecting to finish his testimony at the preliminary hearing on Friday, and hopefully, come home with Jess and her uncle on Saturday.

Not just this community of friends, but whole other communities in his life circle have emerged to provide their love and support. Not the least of them have been the people of Grenada, the authorities there, and the unbelievable owners, staff and guests at La Sagesse Hotel. If you want a Caribbean experience of being loved and honored as a guest, I recommend a vacation there.